the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize