I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Randomize
