absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Randomize