Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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