i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
