is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Randomize
