Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
