got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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