I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
