Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
