why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Randomize