Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
