i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
