9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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