so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize