Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
