thus making me awesome and them whores
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
