So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
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