i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
