I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
