if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
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