i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Randomize
