you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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