I think i peed on brittanys purse
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
May the power of my ass compel you!!
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Randomize