True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
they're like a gay fantastic four
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize