You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
