She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
