Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
