if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
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