Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Pants are for mortals
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
