I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
sarcasm needs its own font
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Randomize