I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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