***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
