i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
