I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
