Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
