dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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