If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
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