Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
