Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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