I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
that's an acceptable place to lick
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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