I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
