Your mouth is God's brothel.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
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