I looked at my own cervix.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
organizing the empties. That sober.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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