what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Randomize
