Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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