I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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