I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize