they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
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