you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
