I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
